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my breasts

My Breasts: A Caress, Not a Mouthful

After the summer of 2014, twenty-three-year-old me watched my C cup breasts disappear into barely A’s. I had failed my then dreams and was punishing my first world problem with a first world solution: guilt, specifically guilting myself into not eating. I didn’t think I deserved to eat because I had failed at a nightmare […]

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first bra

How My First Bra Karma Came Back to Haunt Me

As an awkward and prepubescent 12-year-old, I dreaded recess. It was the time when all the girls would pile into the bathroom to apply their glossy lip smacker and broadcast their beautifully bowed bras. Me, I had one of those handsome Fruit of The Loom tanks. UGH!!!! My mom and I had to talk! It […]

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kickboxing

An Accident in Kickboxing Class

During the summer of 2016, I was just your normal 24-year-old mess looking for a purpose in life. This is also the summer I discovered kickboxing classes. Known for its high energy (excruciating) and time efficient calorie burning (torture), I was sold. The truth is I googled “How do I lose weight easily” which is […]

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My Dad's Favorite Story

It was winter break of my freshmen year of high school when my dad decided to reroute our annual Disney World trip. I think he felt he had sat in enough teacups and was ready for something different. After all, he had two kids in high school and thought it was time to try somewhere […]

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burlesque

Introducing My Boobs: Burlesque Style!

Once upon a time, naked photos could end careers. “Compromising positions” were the stuff of blackmail. Up and coming performers knew better than to risk their integrity by allowing less-than-wholesome images of themselves to surface in public. So as a young, hopeful comedian in the 1980s, I believed my future would be over if anyone […]

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