When you’re motherless before your ovaries find their on-switch, and your boobs blow up like two mismatched balloons, you give yourself the sex talk. Along with the assistance of a puberty book you checked out from the school library. The American Girl, “The Care and Keeping of You,” was the most sought-after library book at […]
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Not to brag, but I have dense fibrous breasts. They have held up over time. However, dense breasts also increase the likelihood of developing cancer. Last year, I found a lump and was ordered to have a mammogram and an ultrasound. It turned out to be a cyst, but they saw other “things” and were like, this is so […]
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In 2013, on Good Friday, I was diagnosed with Triple Negative Breast Cancer. Presumably so named because you don’t, don’t, don’t want to get it. There is no known cause; there is no known cure. They only told me to get my “affairs in order” like I was in a 1940’s black and white noir […]
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I grew up as an only child, so I spent a lot of time alone, and I really, REALLY wanted more friends. “How do people make friends?” “What sort of things does one need to get ahead in the game?” 11-year-old me wondered. Seeing as how I had no friends yet, and no siblings to […]
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It’s 3:00 am, and I’m waiting for this guy, Jeff maybe? No, Drew! No, that’s not right, let’s call him Shane, after Shane Chen, the inventor of the hoverboard. We’ll call him Shane because he left me with two cringe-worthy memories, one about my breasts, which is coming up shortly, and this one, which I […]
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